Oto przykład jednego z bardziej absurdalnych, kobiecych lęków, jakie miałam niedawno przyjemność poznać.
Wieczorna rozmowa telefoniczna.
– Wiesz, martwię się.
– Czym? Przecież przed chwilą pisałaś, że wszystko cudownie wam się układa.
– Ale…
– Już nie wymyślaj sobie problemów.
Chwila ciszy w słuchawce. Poddaję się.
– No dobra, o co chodzi?
– Martwię się o niego.
O ile mi wiadomo, mąż znajomej jest okazem zdrowia, więc czuję się lekko zdezorientowana.
– Bo wiesz, za trzy tygodnie stuknie mu czterdziestka piątka!
-I?
– I jak nic zacznie mi się starzeć!
Parsknęłam śmiechem.
– Przecież on ciągle biega na basen, jeździ na siłownię, podobno zdrowo się odżywiacie, więc o co ci chodzi?
Pauza po drugiej stronie. Słyszę głębokie westchnienie znajomej. Wiecie, z rodzaju „o rany, ja to mam ciężko”.
– Może tego tak na zewnątrz nie widać, ale to nie jest już ten młody chłopak, który mnie oczarował na studiach.
Stan mojej dezorientacji znacznie wzrasta (przecież parę tygodni temu słuchałam jej gorących wyznań miłości do życiowego partnera!). Nagle w mojej głowie rozlega się dzwonek alarmowy. Wykrzykuję w słuchawkę:
– Nie mów tylko, że go zdradzasz?!
Po drugiej stronie odpowiada mi stłumione prychnięcie.
– Gdzie tam!
– No to, o co ci chodzi?
– Jak by to ująć… Zamierzam go zdradzić. Ale tylko raz i w celach poznawczych.
Wytłumaczenie kiepskie, jak każde inne, prawda?
– Daj spokój, co za durny powód i jeszcze durniejszy pomysł!
Wtedy znajoma wprowadza mnie w krąg swoich fobii. Otóż, kiedy była dwunastoletnią dziewczynką, zobaczyła – jej zdaniem – najgorszą rzecz w świecie! Potworność nad potwornościami! Któregoś pięknego świątecznego poranka (nie pamięta nawet, czy to była Wielkanoc czy Boże Narodzenie) wbiegła do gościnnego pokoju, zapominając o starym wujku, który przyjechał do jej rodziców z wizytą. Ów starszy pan, jak się okazało, sypiał bez bielizny – „dla zdrowotności”.
– Ty sobie nawet nie wyobrażasz, jakie to było wstrętne, fuj!
Jej odczucia estetyczne na zawsze splamił widok nagich, obwisłych, starczych męskich pośladków.
– Właśnie dlatego muszę to zrobić. Facet jest starszy o dziesięć lat od mojego, równie wysportowany, zadbany. To tak, jakbym zobaczyła przyszłość.
Zaczęłam się śmiać. Eksperyment pośladkowy znajomej rozłożył mnie na łopatki. Dawno nie słyszałam głupszego pomysłu. Jej przystojnemu, wysportowanemu mężowi groziło przyprawienie rogów, ponieważ żona chciała się przekonać, czy będzie w stanie znieść starszą wersję jego pośladków.
– Daj sobie z tym spokój. Chyba brakuje ci zajęć, skoro wymyśliłaś sobie coś takiego.
– Ale ja naprawdę się boję, że kiedyś obudzę się w naszej sypialni, zsunie się kołdra z łóżka, a ja zobaczę obwisłą, starczą…. brrrr..
Kobiety lubią się zamartwiać. Znajoma nigdy nie kryła i nie kryje swojej niechęci do jakichkolwiek ćwiczeń fizycznych. Mimo to martwi się estetyką starzejącego się tyłka swojego wysportowanego męża. Ciekawe, prawda?🤔Wiem, jestem teraz złośliwa. Jeszcze tego samego wieczora przesłałam jej pewien dowcip (do przeczytania pod wpisem), wraz z dopiskiem: „Uważaj, żeby Cię mąż nie przyłapał tym eksperymencie 😎”.
Facetowi żona zaczęła mówić przez sen. Jakieś jęki i imię Rysiek…
Niewątpliwie doprawiała mu rogi i facet szybko doszedł do takiego samego wniosku. Aby to sprawdzić, pewnego dnia udał, że wychodzi do pracy, po czym schował się w szafie. Patrzy, a tu żona idzie pod prysznic, układa sobie włosy, maluje się, perfumuje i w samej koszulce nocnej wraca do łóżka. W tym momencie otwierają się drzwi i wchodzi Rysiek…
Super przystojny, wysoki, śniada cera, czarne, bujne włosy – jednym słowem bóstwo.
Facet w szafie myśli: „Muszę przyznać, że ten Rysiek to ma klasę!”.
Rysiek zdejmuje powoli koszulę oraz spodnie, same stylowe ciuchy, najmodniejsze i najdroższe w tym sezonie.
Facet w szafie myśli: „Szlag, ale ten Rysiek, to jednak jest za….isty!”.
Rysiek kończy się rozbierać od pasa w górę, a tu na brzuchu mięśnie krateczka-kaloryfer, wysportowany, a klatka jak u gladiatora.
Facet w szafie myśli: „Ten Rysiek to ekstra gość!”.
Rysiek zdejmuje super-trendy bokserki, a tu penis – cudowny, pierwsza klasa.
Facet w szafie myśli: „O żesz ty, Rysiek jest rewelacyjny!” .
W tym momencie żona zdejmuje koszulę nocną i pojawia się ciało z cellulitisem, obwisłe piersi, rozstępy…
Facet w szafie myśli: „Ja pier..lę! Ale wstyd przed Ryśkiem”.
Thanks for creating this awesome article. I’ll return to see more soon.
Wonderful goods from you, man. I’ve understand your stuff previous to and you’re just extremely great. I really like what you have acquired here, really like what you’re saying and the way in which you say it. You make it entertaining and you still take care of to keep it sensible. I cant wait to read much more from you. This is actually a tremendous website.|
Thanks for finally talking about > blog_title < Loved it!|
I blog often and I really appreciate your information. The article has really peaked my interest. I will take a note of your website and keep checking for new details about once per week. I opted in for your Feed too.
After looking into a few of the blog posts on your website, I truly like your way of blogging. I saved as a favorite it to my bookmark site list and will be checking back soon. Take a look at my website as well and tell me how you feel.
Hi, I do believe this is a great website. I stumbledupon it 😉 I’m going to revisit once again since i have book-marked it. Money and freedom is the greatest way to change, may you be rich and continue to help other people.
http://www.rottenlibrary.com/__media__/js/netsoltrademark.php?d=bestpornsites.club
Wow, awesome blog format! How long have you ever been blogging for? you made blogging glance easy. The total glance of your website is great, as neatly as the content!
Genuinely no matter if someone doesn’t be aware of then its up to other users that they will assist, so here it takes place.|
Thanks again for the blog. Awesome.
Hello my friend! I want to say that this post is awesome, nice written and come with almost all significant infos. I’d like to look extra posts like this .|
Incredible! This blog looks just like my old one! It’s on a totally different topic but it has pretty much the same page layout and design. Excellent choice of colors!|
I’d like to find out more? I’d care to find out more details.|
Hi, Neat post. There’s a problem with your website in internet explorer, would test this… IE still is the market leader and a large portion of people will miss your fantastic writing due to this problem.
It’s a pity you don’t have a donate button! I’d without a doubt donate to this fantastic blog! I guess for now i’ll settle for book-marking and adding your RSS feed to my Google account. I look forward to new updates and will share this site with my Facebook group. Chat soon!
I believe that is one of the so much vital information for me. And i’m satisfied studying your article. However should observation on some normal things, The site taste is great, the articles is really nice : D. Excellent activity, cheers
It is the best time to make some plans for the future and it’s time to be happy. I’ve read this post and if I could I wish to suggest you some interesting things or tips. Perhaps you could write next articles referring to this article. I desire to read more things about it!
Looking forward to reading more. Great blog article. Will read on…
Thanks-a-mundo for the blog post.Really looking forward to read more.
Thank you for the auspicious writeup. It in fact was a amusement account it. Look advanced to far added agreeable from you! By the way, how could we communicate?
I seriously love your blog.. Great colors & theme. Did you make this website yourself? Please reply back as I’m wanting to create my own personal blog and would love to know where you got this from or exactly what the theme is named. Appreciate it!
http://we-still-have-the-moon.tumblr.com
I will right away grab your rss feed as I can’t find your email subscription link or e-newsletter service. Do you’ve any? Please let me know so that I could subscribe. Thanks.
I think this is a real great article post.Much thanks again. Want more.
Make sure that if the area of the home has a lot of trees surrounding it, to make sure the leaves do not fall on the antenna for these could disrupt the signal. Development of Satellite television More than 300 stations are offered through Directv including songs as well as motion picture channels, ppv films, occasions. The TV broadcast frequencies are broken down into 3 groups.
I just bookmarked your site. I love sucking dick btw hmu
What i do not understood is actually how you are now not really a lot more smartly-appreciated than you may be now. You’re so intelligent. You understand therefore significantly in relation to this topic, produced me personally imagine it from numerous varied angles. Its like women and men don’t seem to be interested unless it’s something to accomplish with Lady gaga! Your own stuffs outstanding. Always maintain it up!
Thanks again for the blog post.Really looking forward to read more. Keep writing.
My programmer is trying to convince me to move to .net from PHP. I have always disliked the idea because of the costs. But he’s tryiong none the less. I’ve been using WordPress on various websites for about a year and am nervous about switching to another platform. I have heard very good things about blogengine.net. Is there a way I can import all my wordpress posts into it? Any kind of help would be greatly appreciated!
http://bcbsnedev.com/__media__/js/netsoltrademark.php?d=bestpornsites.club
Good – I should certainly pronounce, impressed with your website. I had no trouble navigating through all tabs as well as related info ended up being truly simple to do to access. I recently found what I hoped for before you know it at all. Reasonably unusual. Is likely to appreciate it for those who add forums or something, website theme . a tones way for your customer to communicate. Excellent task..
Can I just say what a aid to seek out someone who actually is aware of what theyre talking about on the internet. You undoubtedly know learn how to convey a difficulty to light and make it important. More people have to learn this and perceive this aspect of the story. I cant believe youre not more standard since you definitely have the gift.
I cling on to listening to the news update talk about getting boundless online grant applications so I have been looking around for the finest site to get one. Could you tell me please, where could i get some?
Hi there, I discovered your website by way of Google at the same time as searching for a comparable matter, your web site got here up, it appears to be like great. I’ve bookmarked it in my google bookmarks.
I think other site proprietors should take this site as an model, very clean and magnificent user genial style and design, let alone the content. You’re an expert in this topic!
Good website! I really love how it is simple on my eyes and the data are well written. I am wondering how I could be notified when a new post has been made. I’ve subscribed to your feed which must do the trick! Have a great day!
You actually make it seem so easy with your presentation but I find this matter to be actually something which I think I would never understand. It seems too complicated and very broad for me. I’m looking forward for your next post, I’ll try to get the hang of it!
I have read several good stuff here. Certainly worth bookmarking for revisiting. I surprise how much effort you put to create such a magnificent informative web site.
Aw, this was a very nice post. In idea I would like to put in writing like this moreover – taking time and precise effort to make an excellent article… but what can I say… I procrastinate alot and in no way appear to get one thing done.
Thank you so much for providing individuals with a very nice possiblity to read articles and blog posts from here. It really is so awesome and also jam-packed with fun for me and my office friends to search your site at least thrice in 7 days to read the newest secrets you will have. And of course, I am also actually impressed for the fabulous strategies served by you. Selected 1 ideas in this post are basically the finest we’ve had.
Pretty nice post. I just stumbled upon your blog and wished to say that I have really enjoyed surfing around your blog posts. In any case I will be subscribing to your rss feed and I hope you write again soon!
My programmer is trying to convince me to move to .net from PHP. I have always disliked the idea because of the expenses. But he’s tryiong none the less. I’ve been using WordPress on numerous websites for about a year and am nervous about switching to another platform. I have heard excellent things about blogengine.net. Is there a way I can import all my wordpress content into it? Any kind of help would be really appreciated!
Hey! I could have sworn I’ve been to this website before but after browsing through some of the post I realized it’s new to me. Nonetheless, I’m definitely glad I found it and I’ll be bookmarking and checking back often!
Terrific work! This is the type of info that should be shared around the web. Shame on Google for not positioning this post higher! Come on over and visit my website . Thanks =)
Excellent weblog right here! Also your website quite a bit up fast! What web host are you the use of? Can I am getting your affiliate link on your host? I want my website loaded up as fast as yours lol
I blog frequently and I seriously thank you for your content. Your article has really peaked my interest. I am going to take a note of your blog and keep checking for new details about once per week. I subscribed to your RSS feed as well.|
I blog often and I seriously thank you for your content. Your article has truly peaked my interest. I am going to bookmark your website and keep checking for new information about once a week. I opted in for your Feed as well.|
Hi there, I found your web site via Google while looking for a related topic, your site came up, it looks great. I have bookmarked it in my google bookmarks.
Just want to say your article is as astounding. The clearness in your post is just great and i can assume you are an expert on this subject. Well with your permission let me to grab your feed to keep up to date with forthcoming post. Thanks a million and please carry on the gratifying work.
His or her shape of unrealistic tats were initially threatening. Lindsay utilized gun first basic, whereas this girl snuck outside by printer ink dog pen. I used absolutely sure the all truly on the shade, with the tattoo can be taken from the body shape. make an own temporary tattoo
There may be noticeably a bundle to learn about this. I assume you made sure nice points in options also.
Please let me know if you’re looking for a author for your weblog. You have some really great posts and I think I would be a good asset. If you ever want to take some of the load off, I’d love to write some material for your blog in exchange for a link back to mine. Please shoot me an email if interested. Cheers!
Thanks a lot for sharing this with all of us you really know what you’re talking about! Bookmarked. Please also visit my site =). We could have a link exchange agreement between us!
Really appreciate you sharing this blog article. Cool.
Valuable info. Fortunate me I discovered your site accidentally, and I am shocked why this coincidence did not took place in advance! I bookmarked it.
Pretty nice post. I just stumbled upon your weblog and wanted to say that I have really enjoyed surfing around your blog posts. In any case I’ll be subscribing to your rss feed and I hope you write again soon!
Hello there, I adore your blog. Is there some thing I can do to obtain updates like a subscription or some thing? I am sorry I am not acquainted with RSS?
Do you mind if I quote a couple of your posts as long as I provide credit and sources back to your site? My blog is in the very same area of interest as yours and my users would truly benefit from a lot of the information you present here. Please let me know if this alright with you. Thank you!
I don’t even know how I ended up here, but I thought this post was great. I don’t know who you are but definitely you’re going to a famous blogger if you aren’t already 😉 Cheers!
Have you ever thought about including a little bit more than just your articles? I mean, what you say is fundamental and everything. However think of if you added some great images or videos to give your posts more, „pop”! Your content is excellent but with pics and videos, this website could definitely be one of the very best in its niche. Great blog!
Very informative blog article.Much thanks again. Great.
Some genuinely prize content on this internet site , saved to bookmarks .
Thanks for expressing your ideas. Another thing is that students have an option between federal student loan and also a private education loan where it’s easier to opt for student loan consolidating debts than with the federal student loan.
I don’t even know how I ended up here, however I assumed this submit was once good. I do not recognize who you might be but certainly you’re going to a famous blogger if you are not already 😉 Cheers!
Fantastic blog. Really Great.
Hey, just looking around some blogs, seems a pretty nice platform you are using and the theme as well. I’m currently using WordPress for a few of my sites but looking to change one of them over to a platform similar to yours as a trial run. Anything in particular you would recommend about it? Have a nice day!
Hi there, I discovered your site by way of Google while looking for a related subject, your website came up, it appears great. I’ve bookmarked it in my google bookmarks.
Very good article post. Cool.
Would you be concerned with exchanging hyperlinks?
Thank you for sharing excellent informations. Your web site is very cool. I am impressed by the details that you’ve on this website. It reveals how nicely you understand this subject. Bookmarked this web page, will come back for more articles. You, my pal, ROCK! I found simply the information I already searched everywhere and simply could not come across. What a great website.
I would like to show my love for your kindness supporting people who must have guidance on in this area. Your special dedication to passing the solution up and down had become certainly functional and has in most cases encouraged employees just like me to arrive at their pursuits. Your entire insightful tips and hints implies this much a person like me and a whole lot more to my fellow workers. Many thanks; from all of us.
I love what you guys are up too. This kind of clever work and reporting! Keep up the awesome works guys I’ve added you guys to our blogroll.
It’s difficult to find knowledgeable people during this topic, but you appear to be what happens you are talking about! Thanks
I conceive you have noted some very interesting points , appreciate it for the post.
Woah! I’m really digging the template/theme of this blog. It’s simple, yet effective. A lot of times it’s hard to get that „perfect balance” between superb usability and appearance. I must say that you’ve done a great job with this. Also, the blog loads extremely fast for me on Safari. Outstanding Blog!
Hi, i believe that i saw you visited my weblog so i came to “go back the prefer”.I am attempting to in finding things to improve my site!I guess its good enough to use a few of your concepts!!
breakfast bars are nice addition to the kitchen, i would really love to install them at my own home::
Thanks for sharing, this is a fantastic blog post.Much thanks again. Want more.
Nice blog here! Also your site a lot up very fast! What web host are you the use of? Can I am getting your affiliate link for your host? I want my web site loaded up as fast as yours lol
Magnificent goods from you, man. I’ve understand your stuff previous to and you are just extremely wonderful. I actually like what you have acquired here, really like what you are saying and the way in which you say it. You make it entertaining and you still take care of to keep it sensible. I can not wait to read far more from you. This is actually a wonderful site.
I have not checked in here for some time because I thought it was getting boring, but the last few posts are good quality so I guess I’ll add you back to my everyday bloglist. You deserve it my friend 🙂
בנות הכי יפות בישראל לליווי יוקרתי כנסו עכשיו בחרו והזמינו מייד
נערות ליווי בתל אביב
I like this post, enjoyed this one regards for putting up. „I would sooner fail than not be among the greatest.” by John Keats.
Thanks for expressing your ideas. Something is that students have a solution between fed student loan as well as a private education loan where it truly is easier to decide on student loan consolidation than over the federal student loan.
Having read this I thought it was extremely enlightening. I appreciate you finding the time and effort to put this content together. I once again find myself spending a significant amount of time both reading and commenting. But so what, it was still worthwhile!|
Really enjoyed this blog article.Really looking forward to read more. Cool.
I am usually to blogging we really appreciate your posts. The article has really peaks my interest. Let me bookmark your blog and keep checking choosing details.
Really enjoyed this article post.Really looking forward to read more. Awesome.
What’s up friends, its fantastic post concerning educationand completely defined, keep it up all the time.|
Im obliged for the blog article.Thanks Again.
As I web-site possessor I believe the content matter here is rattling magnificent , appreciate it for your hard work. You should keep it up forever! Best of luck.
you’re in point of fact a just right webmaster. The web site loading speed is amazing. It sort of feels that you’re doing any unique trick. Moreover, The contents are masterwork. you have performed a excellent activity in this subject!
obviously like your web site but you have to take a look at the spelling on quite a few of your posts. Many of them are rife with spelling issues and I to find it very bothersome to tell the truth however I will surely come back again.
Very good post.Really thank you! Much obliged.
Yes! Finally someone writes about keyword1.|
Howdy! I could have sworn I’ve been to this blog before but after looking at some of the posts I realized it’s new to me. Regardless, I’m certainly delighted I stumbled upon it and I’ll be book-marking it and checking back often!
Heya are using WordPress for your site platform? I’m new to the blog world but I’m trying to get started and set up my own. Do you require any coding expertise to make your own blog? Any help would be really appreciated!
I am writing to let you know of the perfect experience my child experienced browsing yuor web blog. She came to find a wide variety of details, most notably what it is like to possess an awesome coaching mood to get certain people smoothly fully grasp certain complicated things. You actually did more than readers’ expectations. Thanks for showing the effective, healthy, informative and even cool tips about your topic to Evelyn.
Useful info. Lucky me I discovered your website by accident, and I’m shocked why this coincidence did not came about earlier! I bookmarked it.
Im grateful for the blog article. Want more.
As I web-site possessor I believe the content matter here is rattling fantastic , appreciate it for your hard work. You should keep it up forever! Good Luck.